Interesting linkage . . .

[omorka]

Ganked from starcat_jewel:

Popularity and intelligence

An interesting side note to this for me - not only was the nadir 8th grade, for me, once I "escaped" to MSMS, something very interesting happened. We still had popularity rankings, but (a) only a very few scapegoats still got actively shunned, and I think we all felt at least a little guilty about it (and simultaneously relieved that it wasn't us), and (b) athleticism no longer counted for one, while sheer intelligence did, albeit very weakly. I went from being at the rock-bottom at Confederate High to being near the top of the bottom third at MSMS, which was high enough to be mostly left alone. Moreover, those at the top could see the whole ranking clearly, and knew that their position meant that they could associate with anyone they wanted. Thus, several of my female friends were near the top of the hierarchy. Similarly, those of us on the low end associated with whoever would talk to us, secure that we wouldn't fall any lower unless we actively did something stupid.

That we were all near the end of our teen years at the time also probably helped.

And the whole bit about the "prison wardens" - some days, I feel like that's what more than half the faculty are about. Those of us who aren't are always a little edgy about getting involved, because we don't want to be seen as pushing the kids. In some ways, that's easier at the beginning of junior high, in which the teachers are still very much in loco parentis, and at the end of senior high, in which some of the kids are mature enough to look for a Crazy Old Aunt/Uncle figure as a mentor. And, in my own awkwardness and not-fitting-in, I think the nerds of our school see a sense of similarity. And I've clearly survived.

The word I most misunderstood was "tact." As used by adults, it seemed to mean keeping your mouth shut. I assumed it was derived from the same root as "tacit" and "taciturn," and that it literally meant being quiet. I vowed that I would never be tactful; they were never going to shut me up. In fact, it's derived from the same root as "tactile," and what it means is to have a deft touch. Tactful is the opposite of clumsy.

And this is the answer to a question quantumduck asked me six or seven years ago. I wish I had answered it half as well then.

Comments

[memeslayer.livejournal.com]

Partial solution: Make your school large enough that everyone *cannot* know everyone else, and thus cannot form a popularity hierarchy that encompasses the entire school.

[omorka.livejournal.com]

That works under certain circumstances. What happens at our school is that there are parallel racially-based hierarchies - a Black popularity ladder, a Hispanic one, and a White/Asian one. Large chunks of the school are ranked differently on the different ladders - for example, all the debaters have rankings on both their native hierarchies and the White/Asian one if it isn't native. Individual subcultures, like the band and the theater, have mini-hierarchies that work much like the MSMS one, in that the ones at the very top know they can break ranks and often do.

Also, athleticism seems to count for a lot at our school, in that a smart kid who is also a track star gets a high ranking even though track isn't a high-ranking sport.

I guess what I'm saying is that at a larger school, especially a high school, the issue of popularity-rank is a lot more complicated, and nerds, being smart, can generally exploit those complexities to their advantage, but it still results in freaks and nerds taking shit from some quarters regularly.

[memeslayer.livejournal.com]

Interesting. Lamar had academic-based segregation(or "tracking", if you prefer). The upper level was largely white, and there didn't seem to be a White/Hispanic divide. I think people identified more with their group of friends and their clubs than with the larger academic group. The "losers" formed their own groups.

Far more importantly, I observed none of the outcasting/tormenting that I hear about from other schools. If you weren't part of a group, you were bored, not suffering. (Local) popularity didn't mean power, it just meant people liked you more.

Athletics weren't that big of a deal in my circles(although there were a lot of sports teams). I didn't personally know anyone on the football team, and they didn't seem to be accorded any higher respect among the rest of the school. The same was true for the other sports. Even lacrosse, that bastion of the West U people, didn't mean anything outside the field.

[bassfingers.livejournal.com]

In the animal kingdom, individuals define themselves in one of two ways--by their rank within a hierarchy (a hen in a pecking order, a wolf in a pack) or by their connection to a territory (a home base, a hunting ground, a turf).

This is how individuals--humans as well as animals--achieve psychological security. They know where they stand. The world makes sense.

Of the two orientations, the hierarchical seems to be the default setting. It's the one that kicks in automatically when we're kids. We run naturally in packs and cliques; whitout thinking about it, we know who's the top dog and who's the underdog. And we know our own place. We define ourselves, instinctively it seems, by our position within the shoolyeard, the gang, the club.

It's only later in life, usually after a stern education in the university of hard knocks, that we begin to explore the territorial alternative.

For some of us, this saves our lives.

Most of us define ourselves hierarchically and don't even know it. It's hard not to. School, advertising, the entire materialist culture drills us from birth to define ourselves by others' opinions. Drink this beer, get this job, lookc this way and everyone will love you.

What is a hierarchy anyway?

Hollywood is a hierarchy. So are Washington, Wall Street, and the Daughters of the American Revolution.

High school is the ultimate hierarchy. And it works; in a pond that small, the hierarchical orientation succeeds. The cheerleader knows where she fits, as does the dweeb in the Chess Club. Each has found a niche. The system works.

There's a problem with the hierarchical orientation, though. When the numbers get too big, the thing breaks down. A pecking order can only hold so many chickens. In Massapequa High, you can find your place. Move to Manhattan, and the trick no longer works. New York City is too big to function as a hierarchy. So is IBM. So is Michigan State. The individual in multitudes this vast feels overwhelmed, anonymous. He is submerged in the mass. He is lost.

We humans seem to have been wired by our evolutionary past to function most comfortably in a tribe of twenty to, say, eight hundred. We can push it maybe to a few thousand, even to five figures. But at some point it maxes out. Our brains can't file that many faces. We thrash around, flashing our badges of status (Hey, how do you like my Lincoln Navigator?) and wondering why nobody gives a shit.

We have entered Mass Society. The Hierarchy is too big. It doesn't work anymore.

...

How can we tell if our orientation is territorial or hierarchical?

One way is to ask ourselves, If I were feeling really anxious, what would I do? If we would pick up the phone and call six friends, one after the other, with the aim of hearing their voices and reassuring ourselves that they still love us, we're operating hierarchically.

We're seeking the good opinions of others.

What would Arnold Schwarzenegger do on a freaky day? He wouldn't phone his buddies; he'd head for the gym. He wouldn't care if the place was empty, if he didn't say a word to a soul. He knows that working out, all by itself, is enough to bring him back to his center.

His orientation is territorial.

Here's another test. Of any activity you do, ask yourself: If I were the last person on earth, would I still do it?

If you're all alone on the planet, a hierarchical orientation makes no sense. There's no one to impress. So, if you'd still pursue that activity, congratulations. You're doing it territorially.

If Arnold Schwarzenegger were the last man on earth, he'd still go to the gym. Stevie Wonder would still pound the piano. The sustenance they get comes from the act itself, not from the impression it makes on others. I have a friend who's nuts for clothes. If she were the last woman on earth, she would shoot straight to Givenchy or St. Laurent, smash her way in, and start pillaging. In her case, it wouldn't be to impress others. She just loves clothes. That's her territory...

from The War of Art by Steven Pressfield.

[omorka.livejournal.com]

How grossly patriarchal. What about network/web connections to other humans? Not all relation to others is hierarchical, whether among the beasts of among ourselves.

[bassfingers.livejournal.com]

Can you explain? None of the definitions I'm finding seem to have anything to do with what you're trying to express, as far as I can tell. (ie, you seem to be trying to turn this into a gender issue where in my opinion none exists.)

Patriarch \Pa"tri*arch\, n. [F. patriarche, L. patriarcha, Gr.
?, fr. ? lineage, especially on the father's side, race; ?
father + ? a leader, chief, fr. ? to lead, rule. See
Father, Archaic.]
1. The father and ruler of a family; one who governs his
family or descendants by paternal right; -- usually
applied to heads of families in ancient history,
especially in Biblical and Jewish history to those who
lived before the time of Moses.

2. (R. C. Ch. & Gr. Ch.) A dignitary superior to the order of
archbishops; as, the patriarch of Constantinople, of
Alexandria, or of Antioch.

3. A venerable old man; an elder. Also used figuratively.

The patriarch hoary, the sage of his kith and the
hamlet. --Longfellow.

The monarch oak, the partiarch of trees. --Dryde.

Patriarch
n 1: title for the heads of the Eastern Orthodox Churches (in
Istanbul and Alexandria and Moscow and Jerusalem)
2: the male head of family or tribe [syn: paterfamilias]
3: any of the early Biblical characters regarded as fathers of
the human race
4: a man who is older and higher in rank than yourself

Patriarch
a name employed in the New Testament with reference to Abraham
(Heb. 7:4), the sons of Jacob (Acts 7:8, 9), and to David
(2:29). This name is generally applied to the progenitors of
families or "heads of the fathers" (Josh. 14:1) mentioned in
Scripture, and they are spoken of as antediluvian (from Adam to
Noah) and post-diluvian (from Noah to Jacob) patriachs. But the
expression "the patriarch," by way of eminence, is applied to
the twelve sons of Jacob, or to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.

"Patriachal longevity presents itself as one of the most
striking of the facts concerning mankind which the early history
of the Book of Genesis places before us...There is a large
amount of consentient tradition to the effect that the life of
man was originally far more prolonged than it is at present,
extending to at least several hundred years. The Babylonians,
Egyptians, and Chinese exaggerated these hundreds into
thousands. The Greeks and Romans, with more moderation, limited
human life within a thousand or eight hundred years. The Hindus
still farther shortened the term. Their books taught that in the
first age of the world man was free from diseases, and lived
ordinarily four hundred years; in the second age the term of
life was reduced from four hundred to three hundred; in the
third it became two hundred; in the fourth and last it was
brought down to one hundred" (Rawlinson's Historical
Illustrations).

Patriarchy \Pa"tri*arch`y\, n. [Gr. ?.]
1. The jurisdiction of a patriarch; patriarchship.
--Brerewood.

2. Government by a patriarch; patriarchism.

patriarchy
n : a form of social organization in which a male is the family
head and title is traced through the male line [syn: patriarchate]

Patriarchal \Pa`tri*ar"chal\, a. [Cf. F. patriarcal.]
1. Of or pertaining to a patriarch or to patriarchs;
possessed by, or subject to, patriarchs; as, patriarchal
authority or jurisdiction; a patriarchal see; a
patriarchal church.

2. Characteristic of a patriarch; venerable.

About whose patriarchal knee Late the little
children clung. --Tennyson.

3. (Ethnol.) Having an organization of society and government
in which the head of the family exercises authority over
all its generations.

Patriarchal cross (Her.), a cross, the shaft of which is
intersected by two transverse beams, the upper one being
the smaller. See Illust. (2) of Cross.

Patriarchal dispensation, the divine dispensation under
which the patriarchs lived before the law given by Moses.

patriarchal
adj : characteristic of a patriarchy [ant: matriarchal]

[omorka.livejournal.com]

3. (Ethnol.) Having an organization of society and government
in which the head of the family exercises authority over
all its generations.

That one. There are at least three modes of "orientation," to use the article you quoted's term - hierarchical (obviously patriarchal), territorial (the "loner"'s mode, and obviously the one preferred by the author, which is absolutely untenable for a female primate with offspring), and network - interdependent with other humans, but not in a ranked or hierarchical manner.

I think an article that blatantly denigrates the standard female way of dealing with a stressor - "pick up the phone and call six friends, one after the other, with the aim of hearing their voices" - and labels that, what is clearly a reliance on a network, as "hierarchal," clearly has a vested interest in keeping women isolated from each other, trapped in the idea that to be properly functional they should be utterly independent. Very disempowering, especially for women (or men, for that matter) who are good at the network model and not good at being the "wild loner" who touches and is touched by no one.

[starcat-jewel.livejournal.com]

There's a quote of which I've always been very fond -- I think it's by Mark Twain, but I'm not sure (and feeling too lazy to look it up):

Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.

Tact is the difference between "That haircut looks AWFUL!" and "I liked your hair better when it was [longer/shorter/whatever]." It's a vitally important part of basic courtesy. This is how I would explain it if someone was asking me.