Omorka's Lair

On the one hand, I teach at a school that has no majority population. Our kids are roughly 30% African-American (including a non-trivial number of first- and second-generation immigrants from West Africa), 30% Hispanic (with a plurality but not a majority hailing from Mexico within the previous three generations), 20% Asian (including, but not limited to, Chinese, Vietnamese, Indian, Pakistani, Bangladeshi, Korean, and Indonesian), and 10% white (including a small but significant Eastern European recent-immigrant group). Even my group - the math nerds - is far from homogenous; as I mentioned to my group at the Aggie tournament, in a sea of white folks, we were a small island of South Asians, East Asians, and Hispanics.

On the second hand, I attend a church that deliberately attempts to be a home to liberal Christians, liberal Jews, liberal Muslims, true Unitarians, generic theists, religious humanists, agnostic spiritual seekers, humanist atheists, nontheists, Buddhists, and NeoPagans. The co-ministers work very hard to make sure that all of these ideas are supported in their own turns from the pulpit, and that smaller groups within the larger congregations tend to each of these needs. They also work very hard at making sure these different ideas bump up against each other, rub shoulders, scrape a few rough edges, and get a chance to, if not cross-fertilize, at least stay in motion instead of getting stagnant.

So I look around my RL friends group, and what, pray tell, do I see?

1) A very, very bleached group. Off the top of my head, there's but a single person of African heritage, and one or two Asians. No Hispanics at all. Now, I recognize that a lot of my interests, like Celtic music, are statistically unlikely to have too many African-American fans, but given that we're anime geeks, you'd think there would be more Asians around. In contrast, I can count the number of former students I'm still in contact with who are white on the fingers of half a hand.

2) A culturally fairly homogenous group. No one in the group that I can think of is more than two steps removed from me in social class. I can't think of anyone who speaks something other than English as their home language. There are some Libertarians in the group, but few if any social conservatives. And, while we're certainly not religiously homogenous, I have very few friends who are both monotheistic and devout. Those that I can think of are uniformly on the liberal wing of their denomination.

This is embarrassing. Clearly we need to find some new people to be in this social group. Maybe once I leave the school, I really should start inviting my graduates to things. (I can think of a couple I'd like to convert to gamerhood - shouldn't be too hard, as they're hard-core videogamers and anime fans already . . .)

wynnwhy has died.

Most of you who are on my flist who knew him have already found out from someone else; moontyger tried to call me at school to let me know when she found out, but of course my cell phone gets no reception in my classroom. (That's actually probably a minor blessing, as if I'd found that out right after I'd had a fight with my technical boss, I just wouldn't have stopped crying.)

I didn't know Wynn as well as some; for me, he was a fellow Ricie, a fellow Toreador in the Rice game, a damned good host, and all-around cool guy. His death will be a huge loss to the Rice alum community in Houston. But what I remember most are the things he did for the Rice VLARP - hosting a party at his place, working e-mail lists, taking over from EJ when he ditched the clan, playing his secondary character with maniacal gusto.

Getting the waitress's attention at IJump by waving his foot above his head. "Excuse me, the man in the Cat in the Hat socks would like some more coffee!"

Downing the Spouse's can of Grass Jelly Drink.

"What am I going to to with my enormous penis now?"

Rest in Peace, Wynn. You are well remembered.

School has started. My kids rock, except for 2B. Hey, down from five bad classes two years ago to five good ones, ne? More about that mess later . . .

Not this past weekend but the weekend before, I managed to make it to the third annual 3G retreat. I'm really glad I did. I'm not going to say I made a lot of new friends - that's not why I go to these things, but I thoroughly enjoyed myself. I did get to chant with the other ladies (at 3:30 AM - LOL!), we did a craft workshop, I got a scrying reading (decent) and did two Tarot readings (one muddled, one pretty good, I think), a few of us who all have PCOS to one extent or another had a mutual bitch session, and we did a kick-butt ritual (although I think it would have been even cooler if we had waited until after dark to do it - light has a repressive effect on the sorts of emotions that sort of ritual is supposed to bring up, at least for me).

We also did a cute little personality test called the Cube.

*Spoiler Warning* If you haven't done the Cube, either don't read any farther or do it along with the description, as it spoils it to know what the interpretations are. *Spoiler Warning*

The Cube consists of six "questions," for which you write down your responses as you go. The questions are:

1) There's a desert. What does it look like?

2) In the desert, there's a cube. What does it look like? Where is it? Describe it.

3) In the desert with the cube is a ladder. Where is it in relation to the cube? What is it made of? What does it look like?

4) Also in the desert is a horse. Where is it in relation to the cube and the ladder? What color is it? What does it look like?

5) Somewhere in the desert is a storm. What kind of storm is it? Where is it in relation to the cube, the ladder, and the horse? Describe it.

6) Somewhere in the desert are flowers. Where are they? What color are they? Describe them.


Ready? So far, so good. Here were my answers:

1) The desert is made of ridges and dunes of featureless white sand. The sun is directly overhead, and the sky is so pale it is almost white. Nothing grows there; nothing dies there. It is blazingly hot.

2) The cube is gleaming black obsidian, 6' on a side. It is completely covered with cuneiform markings on all sides, including the face-down side. It rests precisely on top of the sand, unscuffed by blowing grains. It is searing hot to the touch, heated by the sun, and smells like hot stone.

3) The ladder is a wooden rung ladder, bleached by the sun and weathered by the scouring sands. It looks rickety. Some of the rungs are loose in their sockets, although none are missing. It rests against the cube in the exact center of the east side, creating a perfect 30-60-90 triangle with the cube and the ground; the top of the ladder is exactly even with the top of the cube.

4) The horse is galloping over the nearest dune to the south of the cube, heading directly towards it. She is a jet-black Arabian mare, and pregnant. She is kicking up showers of white sand where her hooves fall, but none of it is caught in her mane or tail.

5) The storm is off to the southwest, just visible. Anvil-shaped thunderheads scrape the sky; rain is visible falling from their undersides. Lighting can be seen, but the thunder is too distant to hear. The wind blows from the direction of the storm, carrying the smell of rain on wet sand.

6) In the wake of the storm, thin green blades of grass are springing up. At their tips are tiny flowers of pale yellow and blue, hundreds of them barely a quarter of an inch wide. The horse can smell the flowers on the wind.


Funky, neh? So here're the interpretations:

1) The desert is only a backdrop for the other five elements.

2) The cube is yourself.

3) The ladder is your friends.

4) The horse is your mate.

5) The storm is your personal troubles.

6) The flowers are your children (literal or metaphorical).

My, my.

To make things weirder, when we first did this, it didn't ever occur to me that the cube could be any color _but_ black. It shocked the fool out of me when other people started describing their cubes, and they weren't black!

Now, to push this into total freaky-weirdness, I just checked KA's gaming blog this evening and discovered that *she's* played the Cube recently, too!

Hmm . . . looking at the below, it appears I'm in a Big Mama mood again.

I suppose that shouldn't surprise me. I made rice pudding yesterday, for the gods' sake! And now I'm making fried chicken for about 4 or 5 people, when I'm the only one awake to eat it. I've been feeling really protective of my kids lately.

The Spouse has done a complete crash-and-burn for the second weekend in a row. I'm beginning to worry. He knows his sleep patterns are harmful to his health, and he doesn't seem to care.

Weird things are happening within the CMA politics. One of the reps told me this afternoon that there will be a question-and-answer session with the board at Beltane to clear the air, and then no bullshit will be tolerated at the Great Works meeting itself. I hope that will fix what can still be fixed. Really, I think the best option right now would be for the couple of dozen really pissed off people (as opposed to those who are merely confused) to split off into Pheon Ix Star, have their own little gatherings away from the "corrupting" influence of CMA, and not bother those of us who are reasonably happy with this board.

One of my kids, the Kid Who Ain't Got No Feet, got prosthetic lower legs this past week. I got to tell him "Nice shoes". He may even be walking short distances at school by the end of the year, although he's still not going to be able to take the stairs. It's so cool . . .

Ms. K did my evaluation on Wednesday. The kids were about as good as I could've possibly expected them to be, and I think most of them actually learned something. I should get to see the write-up on Monday.

J.G. called last weekend. His company made their presentation, and now they're waiting back to hear whether they got the project. I hope, for his sake, that they do, but I have to admit there is some selfish part of me that would be pleased if they didn't, and the G/K family moved back to Texas because of it. They really don't sound happy out there, although some of the things J. griped about wouldn't be significantly different here. The Spouse says C.I. isn't doing a whole lot better. Is there some way I can have them doing okay and still have them back here? I miss them terribly.

With the G/K and I/M families in Cali, K&A in Indianapolis, and S&M out of my life entirely, the Spouse and I don't have a whole lot of people we see socially these days. We have dinner with the MIL about once a week. If we're lucky, we see M.W. and J.T. twice on the weekends, once to socialize and once to game. Sometimes I get the feeling that they're uncomfortable with us; I know that M.W. and I both feel like we're not as close as we'd like, but don't know what to do about it. P.B. and his various shadows usually show up for Monday Movie Nights, but I don't know any of them very well and P.B. is the only one I have an honest desire to know better. I haven't seen C.S. or G.L. in over a year, although I occasionally get e-mail from them; I've tried calling their place every couple of months or so, but I keep getting the answering machine and they never return the call. I see Goo and the Raven once in a while, and K.H. even more occasionally, but the generational thing keeps getting in the way there. I hesitate to call Rasputin for social stuff, since I know he and I are about 180 degrees apart politically. And I almost never see any of the old Rice people. I'm actually in better touch with the old MSMS crowd than with any of the Rice folks other than M.W.

In short, I want my social group back, and I'm going to be petulant about it. ;)

Really, though, the options for socializing with my colleagues are pretty small. In addition to me being weird, queer, and religiously unacceptable, the majority of them are far too (a) conservative, (b) normal, and (c) dim. I want people I can talk to; I'd end up explaining myself far too often with these folks.

Ah, well. I should be glad we've still got people, even though most of them are scattered to the winds. I really am grateful to M.W. and J.T. for hanging out with us as much as they do. I just don't know who else to reach out to . . .

It's been a long and full weekend . . .

I think I stopped before last Wednesday. Not much happened except that I did make it to the BiNet Houston meeting. I read the article from Siren, hoping to provoke some discussion on identity and acceptance. We ended up talking about polyamory and biphobia instead. Ah, well. A Deaf fellow showed up to the meeting, so I got to see some Sign. Not too many of the regulars showed up, although I certainly can't point any fingers. The Spouse tuckered out after that, so I didn't get to hang out with the visiting G's.

I have little memory of Thursday. The W sisters dropped by the G's; KW wanted to see the rough tape of what JG's finished for _Copyright for Hire_. I had to go looking for it. The Spouse was delayed by the MIL failing her get out of work check (as usual), so we didn't get over to the G's before 8ish. We ended up mostly making plans for the Galveston trip on Friday. Since I was unlikely to be up before noon, JG and AK decided to head down with DG early, meet up with the Spouse and me at the Moody Gardens Aquarium, then hit the Strand, meet the W sisters there, and do dinner. There was some discussion about what type of place we'd want to eat at, and EW mentioned that there was a possibility she might not get to use the car on Friday.

Friday, the Spouse and I passed the UPS truck carrying his new amplifier. I persuaded him to keep driving rather than to go back for it. We went by the Jack In The Box on Montrose to get breakfast. Noah ducked in the drugstore nearby to get some film; meanwhile, I had to go back and get them to fix my order. We made it out of the Montrose around 12:30 pm and made it to Galveston with no trouble and only minor rain. We passed the G's getting out of their car as we pulled into the Moody Gardens parking lot. For a variety of reasons, they hadn't been able to get away from their place as early as they'd've liked. We spent some (rather hot and humid) time in front of the aquarium deciding who was going to go where and do what; we decided to all just by aquarium tickets for the moment.

The Aquarium itself was quite fun. I was a little disappointed to see that only four of the oceans (North Pacific, South Pacific, South Atlantic, Caribbean) were represented - in particular, I missed the Indian ocean. But the Nautilus more than made up for it, even if they were clearly upset by the too-bright light. Seeing the symbol of mathematics as the divine hand in the world living and breathing was just too cool. I also got to contemplate the kelp (I hear a new verse to the "Green God" chant coming on). The Spouse got to watch the penguins, and we got a penny pressed with a penguin embossed on it. We did not escape the gift shop unscathed, either; our stuffed being collection now contains a penguin named Olivia and a squid named Bubbles, who are getting along fabulously with Patricia the Platypus and Edthulhu, respectively.

At that point, after the G's had some lunch in the gift shop, including some odd granular ice cream, we split the party - the G's decided to go see the rain forest pyramid and the dinosaur exhibit, while the Spouse and I hit the Strand. The last time we were there, I found a cute little rock-and-mineral shop. It was nowhere to be seen this time; I couldn't even find the space I thought it was in. We did find a curio shop that merited some interest, and an import shop that carried rather nice batiked clothing, but none in my size. I ended up with a book from the curio shop and a boji stone. The Spouse and I made fun of some high-school kids (looked like either rising seniors or rising college frosh) who were tossing popper-crackers around and making a terrible mess. We waited for the G's at the Mo' Betta Market, next to the place we'd said to meet them, since there was a large outdoor fan and a place to sit there.

We decided to go to dinner. DG wasn't hungry, and neither was JG, but the Spouse and I were, and AK declared that she could eat. We ended up at a not-quite hole-in-the-wall Italian restaurant just off the Strand. I ordered the fettuccine Alfredo with crab meat. I should have had it plain; the crab didn't add anything and screwed with the texture. DG had cheese garlic bread, which he ate one piece of and then obsessively offered to everyone at the table. We ended up taking it with us, along with some of the table bread, to feed the seagulls. We left earlier than intended, as FK got very tired and threw a fit.

We ended up at the Bolivar ferry right at sunset. This time, we parked the cars and walked on as passengers; while it turned out that this wouldn't have mattered on the return, it did save significant time on the way over. We watched the sunset until it stopped spilling into the water; the Spouse took pictures, which we hope will turn out. We had intended to feed the gulls, but there were few enough on the way back that the G's just watched the ocean. I had a talk with Big Mama and worried about the way AK was dangling F off the edge of the boat to let him see better. After disembarking, and returning to the cars, we decided to reconvene at the G's house, where we ended up talking about rewriting our pasts until about 4 am.

Saturday, I didn't wake up until after 5 pm. We went to Bibas with the whole G clan and PB. The maitre d' pinched my elbow again; the other headwaiter who is the father of one of my students either wasn't there or didn't see me. Noah and I ended up carding most of the meal, with the G's paying us back for their part. JG and AK had to head out with F before he threw a fit again. We went back to their place and watched PB and DG sparring on the yard (they're trained in two completely different schools of martial arts). I got to hold PB's bokken; I am rather enamored of wooden weapons. This led to a discussion with JG about the differences between metal, ceramic, and wood for ritual tools. For me, wooden tools become an extension of myself, while metal ones do not; for JG, it's just the opposite.

After the sparring session, we went to a 10:30 showing of _AI_. AK stayed home with F, who wouldn't fall asleep, so I was out with four guys. Without giving any spoilers, let me merely say that the movie was painful - not because it was bad, but because it was powerful. I cried for three-quarters of the movie; DG and PB left while the credits were rolling, and JG came over to see how I was doing. I ended up hugging him with one arm and the Spouse with the other and just bawling. Thanks, guys.

After the movie, PB ducked out and we headed back to the G's. We ended up sitting about and talking, again; JG got DG to tell the story of how he ended up with his current girlfriend.

The Spouse and I couldn't sleep (damn movie) when we got back home, so I stayed up eating canned soup and watching the DVD extras from _Celluloid Closet_. I got to bed around 6:30 Sunday morning, but I still couldn't get to sleep. When the alarm went off at 11:30, I had probably been asleep for about two hours, maybe three. I managed to get presentable, and then noticed that the Spouse wasn't back yet. Paranoid, I called the G's to see if he was over there and had forgotten to pick me up. Nope; turns out he was delayed doing impromptu tech support for the MIL. We gathered the G's and headed to bagels.

Turns out the only other bagels attendees were B and R, with whom I discussed CMA stuff, and PB and EW, whom I didn't interact much with. I said my goodbyes to FK, AK, and JG, since they were leaving for the airport before I'd have another chance to see them; JG promised to try to remember to cc letters to me as well as the Spouse, since we consider our e-mail private. M, a friend of EW's showed up; I vaguely remember meeting him several years ago.

After swinging by the apartment to pick up a folding chair and some bottled water, the Spouse dropped me off at Memorial Park for Drumming in the Spirit of Harmony. I got to see Cloaked By Night and Tequilarose, who I haven't seen in far too long, and KH. I recognized a few of the other people who were there; most of the other people I knew (including B and R again) showed up later. The drum circle didn't hold together very well for the first hour or so; no one wanted to "drive," so unless CBN was doing it, the beat tended to meander. I taught a few people a few chants, and learned the Fanga chant and the two new ones CBN wrote for the Samhain drumming-up-the-sun. For the last half hour, though, the circle really came together; we did the "Nations" chant, and I ended up pulling a lot of energy at the end, which I had to full-body ground (translation: I lay flat on my back in the leaves and dirt for a while). I went home and (more or less ;) ) went straight to bed.

I'm right now doing the laundry and waiting for the UPS guy to bring back the amp. PB and DG are coming by tonight to see how it sounds, and maybe watch some anime and _Celluloid Closet_.

Ponderings:

I am just as hung up on JG now as I was a year and a half ago. I suppose it was foolish of me to think that out of sight would be out of mind; I know perfectly well that I don't work that way. Fortunately, he and AK are tolerant of my weakness. I only wish I could manage to be tranquil about it.

DG is incredibly graceful. I know that - that's why he plays my henchfolk, after all - but I keep forgetting it, and seeing him and PB in action a couple of nights ago really brought it home for me.

I was a little worried that we'd have to deal with one of JG and AK's scenes again; we didn't. JG spent a fair bit of time talking about how much work they've done on their relationship, and how much better it is now, and I can certainly see it. They seem to be having the same sorts of conflicts, and some of the same power issues (although I don't know for sure that some of that wasn't caused by travel stress), but they've learned how to stop before they head into their old dreadful escalating feedback spiral. I'm very happy for them that they've managed to work that out.

The Spouse is here, and wants to use the computer, so I'd better wrap this up.