It's Not Easy Being Transparent

[omorka]

I'm really extremely tired of being seen through.

I've been going to CMA events since 1996, doing workshops since 1998, and running a society since 2000 or 2001, and people whose first gatherings were on the Land keep asking me if I'm a newbie.

I've spent three and a half hours at the Swan and been spoken to only by my waiter.

I post interview memes on my LJ and get no response at all - even from people for whom I've responded to the very same meme.

I make suggestions at work and get no response, only to find out that someone who's been at the school half as long makes a half-assed version of the same suggestion and it gets implemented right away (badly).

I explain something during class and three minutes later a student asks me the very question I just carefully answered.

People talk about me when I'm standing 20 feet away and then are surprised when I'm offended because they didn't even know I heard them.

I can be one of only five people in costume in a 50-person LARP and still get less active role-play time than a college kid who wandered in not knowing what game it was.

I can flirt like mad at a Pagan bunnyfuck-in-the-woods and get sexual attention from exactly two people, one of whom is married to me and the other of whom probably would have flirted with me if I hadn't been showing my tits because he flirts with (literally) everyone.

I am beginning to suspect I could strip in the street while playing conga drums and no one would even look at me.

Really, I'm not that much of an exhibitionist, but am I truly that invisible?

Comments

[gentlyepigrams]

I started going to the Swan before mcroft, but when I first started going with him, everybody assumed I was new. I had to whip out my street cred and my copy of One Voice for years to get people to quit asking me that. (I haven't seen you here before .... well, that's because you weren't looking, I've been coming to Celtic gigs since 1992!)

I've seen the ask-what-the-teacher-just-explained from both ends, both in school and in the RP version where the GM repeats herself about five times.

And the meme popularity contest depresses me, which is one reason why I've mostly stopped doing lemmings and memes.

IOW, it's depressing as hell, but I'm not sure it's you. I think it's the suck state of the world.

[brezhnev.livejournal.com]

Well, shucks, I know how you feel sometimes. Consider yourself hugged.

[bassfingers.livejournal.com]

You got a waiter at the duck to talk to you? That's more than most patrons can say!

[bassfingers.livejournal.com]

Oh, and the interview meme isn't terribly different than the "interesting things" meme from december.

[memeslayer.livejournal.com]

<hugs omorka>

I read all your stuff. I just couldn't think of any good questions at the time I read your survey post. :(

I'm really bad at the interview things

[binaryathena.livejournal.com]

I don't always have the time to answer questions back and then I feel bad.
I do pay attention to you though

hugs

[fyredrago.livejournal.com]

I won't lie.. I saw the interview thing & thought about doing it, but frankly I wasn't in the mood *sorry*.... & have been keeping pretty busy since I got home again as usual. I pretty much stopped doing anything on LJ if you haven't noticed (college is such a pain-in-the-ass...). & to answer your question, you really aren't that invisible. People just aren't observant & have been busy probably... *shrugs*

[omorka.livejournal.com]

That's true, but my friends list has almost doubled since the last time it came around - I wasn't expecting new brilliance from you or the other old-timers, but I was hoping for something from the more recent additions, especially since I stole it from two of them. :/

Re: I'm really bad at the interview things

[omorka.livejournal.com]

Nu, I post them more for the pleasant mental exercise involved in answering the questions (and the pure attention meretriciousness) than for the opportunity to ask other people questions . . . (not that that's not fun, too).

And like I said to bassfingers, I wasn't necessarily expecting stuff from y'all who've been here as long as I've had this blog - y'all had your shot back at the original "interview me!" meme. It was just symptomatic of the way life has been treating me lately.